Let’s continue to look at the characteristics of disloyal people. Remember, we said, Number one, they don’t like to submit to authority. Number two, they are over ambitious. Number three, they gossip a lot. They are tale bearers. Let’s look at the rest and consciously avoid these pitfalls.
Disloyal people are not dependable in the time of crisis.
Every relationship will be tested. Any relationship that does not experience a moment or period of turbulence is certainly not a relationship that will last long. A disloyal person sees a time of crisis as a time to get his/her pound of flesh over a suffered wrong. They forget the good things they have benefited from the relationship, they are only consumed with the perceived wrong done to them. They are fair weather friends, they are only there for the good days. They like you when things are smooth, the moment things are tough they begin to doubt your sincerity, competence and integrity.
They respond to correction negatively.
Disloyal people don’t like to be corrected. They are highly opinionated. They are stubborn about what they want or want to do. They vilify the messenger while they discard the message. Sometimes they know in their heart of hearts that what they are being told is right but they would go and dig up something wrong that the person had said or done to nullify the current message.
There are valuable lessons in yielding to correction, you will be all wiser for it. “He who refuses correction despises his own soul, but he who listens to reproof gets understanding” (Prov. 15:32 WEB).
The writer of Proverbs had a lot to say about the benefits of yielding to corrections and the consequences of not yielding. “Whoever loves correction loves knowledge, but he who hates reproof is stupid” (Prov 12:1 WEB). “Whoever disregards discipline comes to poverty and shame, but whoever heeds correction is honored” (Prov. 13:18 NIV). “He, that being often reproved hardeneth his neck, shall suddenly be destroyed, and that without remedy” (Prov 29:1). The Good News Bible puts Prov 29:1 succinctly “If you get more stubborn every time you are corrected, one day you will be crushed and never recover” Your unwillingness to take to correction says a lot about you!
Disloyal people are usually right in their own eyes.
They never admit they can be wrong. Whenever they are corrected, they look for excuses or means by which they can justify themselves. An important factor about life is this: YOU CANNOT ALWAYS BE RIGHT. Sometimes you will be right, at other times you may be wrong. The reason God has placed men in our lives is so that they can show us when we are wrong and then we make necessary adjustment. God uses those who are not wise in their own eyes. Saul was made king of Israel when he was small in his own eyes, he was rejected when he became wiser than God who gave him an instruction(1 Sam. 15: 17).
There will be times when you are right, but when an opposite opinion is presented, your ability to bow to another’s idea or instruction which is right without fighting for yours shows how loyal you are.
They don’t see beyond their immediate gratification.
The thing about disloyal people is that they have a short memory and blurred vision. They seem to forget the good that has been done to them in times past by those they are now disloyal to and they also fail to see what lies in the future for them in that relationship. They are so obsessed with the happenings of the present to the point that they lose sight of the good days ahead. Never forget this, seasons come and go. Tough and rough times don’t always last.
Any wise leader should choose a loyal follower over and above a skillful or gifted person because invariably, a loyal person will become skillful. “And the things that thou hast heard of me among many witnesses, the same commit thou to faithful men, who shall be able to teach others also” (2Tim 2:2). It doesn’t mean a skillful person can’t be loyal at the same time.
You may never know the pain of disloyalty until you experience one. This is why wherever you find yourself especially in a local church, you must ask yourself “Is this pastor worth following?” “Am I ready to give my all to this group of believers no matter what?” These questions prepare you for a journey of loyalty. Every venture in life requires loyalty e.g. friendship, marriage, business etc.
It is the seed of loyalty you sow today that produces a bountiful harvest of loyalty of others to you in the future. But your motive for being loyal should never be for what you can get from it.
My prayer is, may we find loyal men and women when we need them and may we be loyal to those God has brought into our lives. Amen!